Friday, June 30, 2006

What happened here?

Why did I stop writing??? Why did I lay my pen on paper never to pick it up again? Is it because I stopped believing I could write? Is it because I began to think no one appreciated it? Whatever the reason may be I realized I gave up an integral part of me. Writing is something that was an outlet for my very soul - be it a poem or a story or a simple essay. It took me 2 days and a seminar to realize, I wrote for myself and if people came across it, good for them. I am in love with my pen and paper once more. After this I will be able to reproduce what I write in film, an effective medium. I will be able to let the world take a look at a soul that I hid so long.

They talked about dreams. They meant a lot to me…and they still do. But somewhere along the line I have lost focus. I am young and vibrant and full of dreams. What I lacked was the determination to see them materialize into reality. I don’t hesitate anymore and I am not afraid of my dreams. I WILL make them happen.

This discussion has somehow changed the way I look at myself as a person and other people. I wonder how a group of people with THEIR dreams can change the way I think. It seems ridiculous… even to me. I who always scoffed at such meets and discussions am actually empowered by it!!! They are a bunch of people my age or a little older and they had such a profound effect on me. Somewhere deep sown everything they said I kept telling myself “this is their job, they are going to say stuff like this”. but after Jourdan read “the dreamer’s manifesto” I came into the light. Everyone who spoke added something that has enriched my life and made me a better person, a better friend, daughter, sister and a better human being.

Everyone was going ga-ga over them. They were really good. I don’t know if I should tell them what an impact they had on my life. Surprising! because I have been an extremely frank person all my life and not afraid to speak my mind. Yet, I am a little apprehensive. I don’t really know why. Maybe I should. Then maybe I shouldn’t.